Educational Leadership: What Else is Possible? | VoiceAmerica™ | Talk Radio | Online Talk Radio

What a perfect fit! Activating Energy founders, Mary and Margaret and my focus through Humor Quest on Humergy! This energy and enthusiasm will blow the roof off! Looking forward to my May 16th interview with Mary Meduna and Margaret Ruff on Voice America Educational Leadership: What Else is Possible? | VoiceAmerica™ | Talk Radio | Online Talk Radio

Top Ten Reasons Humor is FUNdamental for Living

The Top Ten Reasons Humor is FUNdamental for Living

By Mary Kay Morrison, Humor Quest

Today’s mighty oak is just yesterday’s nut that held its ground.

Humor is just the fertilizer needed to nurture stressed and anxious folks as they cope with the cognitive/technological revolution that is shaping the 21^st century.  A review of neuroscience research indicates that healthy and positive humor can have a significant impact on lifestyle.  The intentional cultivation of humor practice nourishes our energy (humergy) and can have a powerful impact on our life.   Here are the top ten reasons that people purposefully choose humor as an essential strategy for optimal well-being: 

10. Humor plants memories. Powerful emotions are at the root of long-term memory.  Think about your strongest memory of early elementary school. Chances are that this memory is linked to a strong emotional experience—either positive or negative.   When the memory goes-forget it!   

9.   Humor grows coping skills.   Humor has often been used as a survival technique for prisoners of war.  Most of us are trying to survive the constant change of new technologies. Just trying to figure out how to operate our phones can be stressful.  Some research indicates that laughter increases adrenaline, oxygen flow, and pulse rate. After experiencing laughter, most people report feeling relaxed and calm.   No sense being pessimistic, it wouldn’t work anyway!

8. Humor cultivates energy and engagement. Purposeful games, directed play and physical activity all promote humor and learning.  The research on the benefits of movement and learning supports the idea that play and laughter increase the oxygen levels and energy that are critical for well-being. Energizer Bunny Arrested; Charged With Battery!

7. Humor captures and retains attention.  Laughter and surprise can hook even the most reluctant learner.  Emotion drives attention and attention drives learning. The brain cannot learn if it is not attending. Humor generates the unexpected, which alerts the attentional center of the brain and increases the likelihood of information recall.  Lost In Thought-It’s Unfamiliar Territory!

6. Humor neutralizes stress.  Humor will decrease depression, loneliness and anger. The contagious nature of laughter is caused by mirror neurons or “brain cells that become active when an organism is watching an expression or behavior that they themselves can perform.” If you see someone laughing, even if you don’t know the reason for the laughter, you will probably laugh anyway. Laughter is contagious. Catch it! Spread it!  He Who Laughs-Lasts! 

5. Humor enhances relationships. They may not remember what you said, but they will remember your sense of humor and how they felt when they were with you.  Build a Humor Haven in your workplace or your home filled with joke, riddle and humorous books. Make time for play. Fill your life with things that bring you smiles, including clown noses, squish balls, games/ puzzles.  What would Scooby do?

4. Humor nurtures creativity. The employment market has transitioned from agriculture and manufacturing jobs to positions requiring ingenuity and inventiveness. Humor promotes creativity and critical thinking skills.  Often humor comes from unconnected, random thoughts.  Grow creativity through laughter yoga, telling funny stories or playing games.  Do Not Disturb, I am Disturbed Enough Already!

3. Humor facilitates communication. Humor is a great way to build relationships with others.  Understanding your humor style will assist your humor practice.  Humor is a social lubricant.  It has the power to generate a culture of trust in your organization.  If you understand and nurture a constructive humor style, it will positively impact your ability to communicate. Humorous interaction between coworkers encourages a healthy, productive work environment.  A Closed Mouth Gathers No Foot!

2. Humor supports the change process. We are faced with change on a daily basis. When you can laugh about unexpected challenges or even your own health issues, you know you will survive and even thrive.   A great strategy is to create a top ten list of “What’s So Funny” about the change or challenge.    Change is good-you go first!

And now for the number one reason to laugh frequently and often…

1.  Humor Is FREE and FUN.  Living well includes humor and joy. The current fast pace of many life styles can bury a sense of humor. Dig around for humor resources to share with your friends and colleagues.   Do not let anything rob you of your passion for bringing joy to your life.  I want to live forever- so far so good!

Nurture your sense of humor, by spending time in developing and growing your humor practice.   Consider keeping a humor journal, spending time with colleagues who make you laugh, and purposefully including humor in every lesson everyday. Carefully cultivate your humor being to fully share the abundance of joyful living Remember humor is a fundamental factor in the cognitive/technological revolution that needs to shape 21^st century education. 

Never take life too seriously- you won’t get out alive.

Humorphobia and Humordoomers

Humorphobia is the fear of fun, laughter, and humor. Humorphobia exists as a transparent thread often woven into the fabric of our lives.  Most leaders are passionate about creating a happy work environment, yet are hampered by unspoken negative belief systems that permeate our organizations.

Have you heard statements like this in your workplace?

• We need to be professional here. What will the public think if we are having fun and laughing?
• We cannot measure humor. It’s “soft data” and not meaningful in the workplace. We only operate from solid research.
• We don’t have time for fun and games. Let’s just get this meeting over with.
• I don’t do “touchy feely.”
• I’ve tried humor before and it didn’t work!

The belief systems behind humorphobia are deep rooted fears that include'

• Fear of not having time for humor because of accountability expectations
• Fear of being perceived as silly, unproductive, an airhead, and unprofessional
• Fear of losing “control”  
• Fear of inadequacy or inability to tell a joke coupled with inexperience in the use of humor (because humor is not taught or modeled in most training programs)
• Fear of punishment or retaliation in an environment that is hostile or unaccustomed to humor
• Fear of being made fun of or being the brunt of jokes
• Humorphobia is often barely perceptible, but has a tremendous impact on humor practice. The fears that generate humorphobia create substantial barriers for creating and sustaining humergy.

Humorphobia breeds humordoomers. Humorphobia impacts both the administrator and employee by undermining confidence, stifling creativity, and sabotaging humor practice. Working long and hard seems to be the societal norm for proving commitment and effectiveness. Time is a precious commodity and the increased demands require employers to make every minute count.

A humordoomer is a person who consistently uses negative humor to control and manipulate others. Humorphobia breeds humordoomers, skilled crafters who use subtle techniques to suppress humor in the workplace. Humordoomers are usually unhappy individuals stressed by the dual demands of accountability and limited time constraints; they’re pessimistic leeches that can suck the humergy right out of you. Grown in a petri dish of fear and anger, these folks are threatened by joyful energy and enthusiasm. They often use humor to manipulate others and to maintain a level of control of their world. Their negative humor reflects their unhappy immersion in the confining straits of a workaholic world. Often their techniques are so woven into the fabric of a culture that not only are they unaware of their own webbing effect, their unsuspecting prey are oblivious as well.

Humorphobia and humordoomers create a toxic work environment.   

What strategies do you use to combat these types of beliefs and behaviors?  I have a chapter devoted to this topic in my book, "Using Humor to Maximize Living", however I know creative and caring people have workable ideas.  Would love to hear what you think! 

YES: Humor is Profitable!

One of my colleagues remarked recently that humor is difficult to "sell".  I have yet to meet anyone who says that humor is not important, but what does it take for companies to "buy" training in humor development? Are skills like creativity and humor even on the radar of Human Resource Departments or have they ever flickered across the minds of company executives?

Creativity is the ability of the brain to bring together diverse ideas that will generate the thinking necessary for complex problem solving. Humor and creativity are great companions, each a perfect complement for the other in nourishing thinking. Risk-taking is the nucleus of creativity and of humor; the freedom to express wild ideas activates spirited conversation and sparks the imagination. Creativity and positivity flourish when accompanied by a sense of humor.

Forward thinking executives realize that the old solutions don't work any more. It takes creativity and practice to be able to change thinking and increase productivity.  Exploring the benefits of creative thinking has reaped big benefits for companies like Google.  Google has unorthodox “rules” for employee behavior.  Their web site states that employees can create their office environment by showcasing team interests and personality.  Bikes are often used for efficient travel between meetings.  It is not unusual to see dogs, lava lamps and massage chairs in office spaces.  There are volleyball courts, pianos, ping-pong tables and pool tables.  Healthy lunches are served in the café with snacks and drinks in the break rooms.  This is not your typical workplace, but it sure sounds like a fun place to work.  One reason Google has been so successful is because of their emphasis on creativity and fun. 

Humor increases the potential for divergent thinking and the capacity for solving complex problems. By linking diverse areas of the brain, humor forges new neural connections  involving previously existing concepts. Voila: creativity flourishes. This means that it is essential to encourage the employees in your organization "think outside the box,"  Humor is a viable way to do this!

Excerpts in this blog are taken from my new book, Using Humor to Maximize Living. 

Humor Activates A Child’s Brain

Humor adds to  brain growth in kids!  Check out this article!

HealthWatch: Stanford Study Shows How Humor Activates Child’s Brain « CBS San Francisco

Humordoomers; Bullying Behavior

January can be a cold and depressing month in the Midwest.  Trying to liven up my workplace during a particularly dark day, I suggested that we plan a "Hawaiian Day".  We could put on music, bring in beach foods,  pictures of sunny vacations. and have a trivia contest. In the midst of my excitement and during the crescendo of my planning, one of my co-workers looked at me with a sneer and said, "You don't have enough to do--do you?"  It was as if I was hit over the head with a conch.  

Thus the term, "humordoomer" was created, a definition that evolved from my reflections on this office event.  I wrote extensively about this in chapter 4 of my book, Using Humor to Maximize Learning.  The title of the chapter is: Hurtful Humor is No Laughing Matter.  

"A humordoomer is a person who consistently uses negative humor to control and manipulate others. Humorphobia breeds humordoomers, skilled crafters who use subtle techniques to suppress humor in the workplace. Humordoomers are usually unhappy individuals stressed by the dual demands of accountability and limited time constraints; they’re pessimistic leeches that can suck the humergy right out of you. Grown in a petri dish of fear and anger, these folks are threatened by joyful energy and enthusiasm. They often use humor to manipulate others and to maintain a level of control of their world. Their negative humor reflects their unhappy immersion in the confining straits of a workaholic world. Often their techniques are so woven into the fabric of a culture that not only are they unaware of their own webbing effect, their unsuspecting prey are oblivious as well."

Bullies are often humordoomers.  They use humor as a weapon to belittle and make fun of others.  There has been a lot written recently about bullying behavior, but not much on how they use negative humor control and manipulate others.  Again, this is  addressed in my articles on humor. 

"A bullying type of humor can be used to control what happens in relationships. When making fun of others, bullies are usually expressing internal fears because they are unable or unwilling to recognize their own emotional needs. Humor becomes a weapon of the bully, when used with the intentional purpose of wounding another.

"Bully behavior is frequently portrayed in the media as an acceptable method to express frustration, hostility, fears, and anger. The use of mockery and sarcasm allows the venting of anger. Jokes with the express purpose of making fun of others abound on television, in movies, and on the Internet. Our fears of difference in culture have often been expressed in jokes about Italians, Jews, Mexicans, gays, and religious entities. While often clever, these jokes perpetuate the bully mindset that it’s okay to make fun of individuals or groups. There is research to suggest that this type of humor can lead to violent behavior. "

Think about the humordoomers and bullies in your life.  When I facilitate workshops on humor, people are quickly able to identify these people in their lives.  I am always asked  how to deal with these folks.  There are numerous suggestions in my book as shown from this excerpt. 

"While difficult to deal with, there are some strategies that you can use to stimulate humordoomer reform. Attempt to identify the cause of the negative behavior exhibited by humordoomers and follow this with suggestions for change. This requires a loving attitude and skillful communication. (Note: these negative patterns of behavior are usually hardwired after years of repetition.) The following are strategies to combat stressed humordoomers (who are fearful and overwhelmed):

‑Kill them with kindness and understanding. Often people need someone to listen to them and empathize.

‑Identify the strengths in this person and tell them how much you appreciate this quality in them. It really helps if you have several staff members doing this.

 ‑Ask them what they are going to do to make things better. Encourage any attempts at improvement.

The following are strategies for pessimistic humordoomers (who are habitually negative):

 ‑Smile and say “If you tell me something awful, I need you to tell me three positive things. I just can’t handle negativity today!”

‑Do the broken record routine: “So what’s the good news?” Just keep repeating this with a laugh. If they come up with something positive, cheer and do cartwheels!

And the way to combat angry humordoomers, who are resentful and frustrated with a lack of control in their life and who are unable to express their feelings in positive ways; is to recognize that these folks may actually need more help then you are able to give. If you have the opportunity, suggest that they seek counseling and/or therapy."

Feel free to share your ideas and techniques for dealing with humordoomers  in the comment section below.  Personally, I consciously make an effort to try to include more positive people in my life and spend as little time as possible with humordoomers.  For more suggestions and ideas on what to do about negative folks, do check out my Humor Quest web site.  And join me in continuing to include more laughter and joy in your life!

Don't Laugh- I'm Serious!

"Are you going to make us laugh?"  Inevitably someone asks me this when I arrive to give one of my infamous presentations on the topic of humor.  So I usually say: "Of course not!  This is going to be  a serious session!"  And then they do laugh!

So many people associate humor with joke telling!  And although I do numerous presentations on brain health and humor,  I am not really a "joke teller".  My humor style is usually slight exaggeration, comparisons and gentle teasing.  But the pressure to at least try to tell jokes got to me one day. I had an important meeting to conduct for about 60 people and I decided that I would start with a joke.

After much practice, just to be sure that I remembered the punch line, I was ready.  I got up to the microphone and welcomed people, thanking them for being there.  And I told my joke.  There were a few groans and some embarrassed laughter. I was kind of frustrated because my joke seemed to have bombed.   After the meeting, I asked my good friend why she thought the joke did not go very well.  Somewhat sheepishly she looked at me and asked me if I  knew that the joke had a sexual innuendo  and was kind of naughty. I did not!  Those that know me will realize that I have never "gotten" those kind of jokes. I can only blame this inexperience on my 12 years in Catholic schools.  I still cannot believe that I was so naive, but the real problem is that I really still do not understand the hidden sexual meaning in this joke!

To this day, I remember cringing whenever I thought I saw someone from that meeting.  However, as with most of our life challenges, this story has served me well by becoming a great example in my workshops, of what NOT to do when trying to incorporate more humor in life.

The ability to tell jokes is a valued skill, but the ability to share humergy (the energy that comes from having a sense of humor) is even more important.  For more information on the benefits of humor, humergy and how to purposefully incorporate more humor in your life, check out my web site, Humor Quest   and my book, Using Humor to Maximize Living. 

 

When I Grow Up Wanna Be a Tap-Dancing Gypsy

Last week my 6-year-old granddaughter brought home a beautiful self-portrait. She said that her teacher asked them to draw what they were going to be when they grew up. With great detail my grandchild described the hat, shoes, and fancy clothing that depicted a tap-dancing gypsy. I sought to clarify her goals and after a little discussion, she asked me what a gypsy was. When she found out that it was someone who travels lightly and even wanders form place to place, she was quite satisfied with her decision.

After quite a bit of laughter with my daughter (her mom), I believe that I too want to be a tap-dancing gypsy when I grow up. I love to dance and move and hope that I can always enjoy the activity that comes to express joyful energy. I also know it is a powerful way to keep the brain engaged when the body is moving and active. So the tap-dancing sounds like something that I would like to try someday. 

Traveling like a gypsy and wandering around in a rather random pattern is a way that my husband and I like to travel sometimes. It is exciting to find adventure in new places and meet new people. Our favorite travel experiences have come from chatting with folks along the way…asking for their recommendations of places to explore in the area. Of course we always ask for the hometown restaurants that they enjoy.

 If you are familiar with my books and web site, you know that I believe that play is critical for optimal health and well being for the brain. Play keeps the brain active and engaged. Joyful play is essential for lifelong learning with humergy (the energy that comes from optimism, joy and humor).

 My granddaughter’s goals are mine too. I really never do want to “grow up”. I want to continue to do cartwheels, swing at the park and use the hula-hoop. And a tap-dancing gypsy sounds like an amazing and fun goal.

Becoming a Humor Being

“Today’s mighty oak is just yesterday’s nut that held its ground.”

In a nutshell, humor is a fundamental and integral core of our cognitive emotional growth. The fertile ground of trust and the elements of nurturing relationships are required for humor to take root. 

Humor is an often overlooked skill that many people take for granted.   A closer look finds that humor provides enormous benefits, including stress relief, maximizing learning, increasing creativity, improving communication skills, and creating an environment of trust. Humor is inseparable from our whole being. It is intrinsically woven into our emotional and social psyche reflecting our ethics and belief systems. A sense of humor defines the social and emotional psyche known as our humor being. 

Humor is usually thought of as something that makes you laugh or is amusing. However, a sense of humor is actually the capacity of a human being to respond to life challenges with optimistic amusement. There is a synergy evident in people who have such an optimistic sense of humor. Humergy is the energy that radiates the joyful optimism of our inner spirit, reflects our unique personality, and nourishes a healthy mind/body balance. 

When there is a combination of enthusiasm, energy, joy, and hope, there emerges a peak experience that can be identified as a sense of humor. The relatively new field of positive psychology strives to understand and promote the human potential that enables individuals and communities to thrive. Humor is one of the complex cognitive strengths that emerge connecting our basic temperament and our lifetime experiences.

Many people and organizations are contributing to the pioneering field of humor research.  I volunteer on the board of the international AATH (Association for Applied and Therapeutic Humor).  The mission is to serve as the community of professionals who study, practice and promote healthy humor and laughter. 

Each person can improve their humor being by engaging in mindful humor practice.  Here are a few suggestions;

• Notice what makes you laugh and keep a journal of the funny things that happen each day.
• Hang out with optimistic and joyful people. Avoid humordoomers.
• Practice laughing out loud.  Choose funny movies, books and television shows.
• Engage in healthy humor practices. 
• Observe your humor style. Notice what kind of humor you prefer-puns, jokes, stories or slapstick. 
• Read my book, Using Humor to Maximize Living! 

A humorist facilitates the capacity of self and others to adapt to everyday events or global change, with laughter and optimistic humor.  How are you nurturing your humor being? 

“If you haven’t got a sense of humor, you haven’t any sense at all.”

Mary McDonald

Mother's Day

Mother's day is a time to celebrate all of the joyful energy that occurs between a mother and their child. That energy changes over time creating new learning opportunities for both. The brain of the new mom has fascinating structural changes according to Scientific American; A New Mom's Changing Brain .

"Using MRI, Kim and her colleagues at Yale University and the University of Michigan at Ann Arbor produced detailed maps of the brains of 19 new mothers a few weeks after they gave birth. At around the same time, the researchers asked mothers to select words from a list of positive descriptors such as “beautiful,” “perfect” and “special” to describe how they felt about their babies and about their experience of parenting.

When the scientists mapped the mothers’ brains again about three months later, some areas had grown, including the hypothalamus, amygdala and substantia nigra—regions that animal studies suggest are involved with caring for, learning about and forming positive feelings toward newborns. The planning and decision-making part of the brain, the prefrontal cortex, also grew. In addition, mothers who initially chose more of the positive words to describe their feelings about their babies showed more brain growth. The investigators do not yet know what causes what—if brain growth leads to more positive feelings, or vice versa—but the results indicate for the first time a connection between mothers’ subjective feelings and physical changes in the brain. Kim says they are planning more studies to investigate the phenomenon, including one that will look for similar changes in fathers."

This article helped me reflect on my own experiences as a mom. Most of the time I loved being a mother to four amazing kids. I remember rocking my infants and looking with wonder at these tiny miracles of life. However, there were also times when I wondered if I was going to survive the stressful challenges of balancing work and family. How could I possibly provide each of them what they needed from me. Often I struggled with trying to figure out exactly what they needed. Those days are a distant memory and yet I know that I learned so much from my experience as a mother.

Now I relish being a grandparent to 11 incredible grandchildren (with one more coming anytime). I able observe the feelings of joy and wonderment of being a parent through the eyes of my grown children and their wonderful spouses. It is a blessing to be a grandmother. I wonder if they will ever do a study on how the brain of a grandparent changes.

Happy Mother's Day!